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Columbus Blue Jackets

21-19-4 (46)

The New Jersey Devils and the War Room in Toronto each scored third period goals to beat host Columbus 2-1.

Kevin Weekes was the winning goaltender, another sign that black folks will soon take over Canada's sport.

Next up: at Vancouver, Sunday, 8pm

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Spineless War Room in Toronto screws Blue Jackets yet again

Saturday, January 17, 2009 1:20 AM

Jason Williams made his Blue Jackets debut, RJ Umberger made a game-changing mistake, and Kevin "I'm a black dude that plays hockey" Weekes won his second consecutive start as New Jersey and the War Room in Toronto beat host Columbus 2-1.

John Madden scored the game-winner in the third period. With all due respect to Madden's hard work and quick thinking, his fifth goal of the season came thanks to Head Horsefucker Colin Campbell's War Room in Toronto. Eight assholes in a video room couldn't decide if the net was knocked loose before the puck got past Columbus goalie Steve Mason, so they simply sent the call back to Polack referee Don Koharski, who allowed the goal to stand. Bet your sister's cunt that it was bad business. Guess the boys in Toronto were too busy licking each other's assholes to make what should have been an obvious call: Marc Methot was pushed into the net by New Jersey's Jamie Langenbrunner, dislodging the net off its moorings before the puck went past Mason.

Michael Arace and Aaron Portzline of The Columbus Dispatch made some excellent postgame observations in said fishwrap's Puck-Rakers blog. Click on the link for analysis from people who get paid to watch the game while abstaining from drinking heavily. Arace was also kind enough to remind us of our favorite hockey moment, starring Don Koharski:

He also pointed out what we forgot to mention when we first posted this piece of shit just after midnight: Devils forward David Clarkson hauled down Fedor Tyutin and took the puck away from him before Madden's goal was scored. Where's the fucking penalty?

Manny Malholtra scored the lone Columbus goal on an assist from Kristian Huselius in the second. Columbus had other chances thanks in part to staying out of the goddamn penalty box, but was unable to pad their 1-0 lead.

Despite another solid effort from Mason, one of the leading Calder and Vezina trophy candidates, the Devils were able to tie the game with a third period power play goal. Derek Dorsett was called for tripping-the lone Blue Jackets penalty, which tied a franchise low for penalty minutes against. Six seconds later, RJ Umberger whiffed on an unobstructed clearing attempt. Travis Zajac was able to take the loose puck and beat Mason to even the score.

Devils coach Brett Sutter on Madden's horseshit goal:

"The call was the call on the ice. He called it a goal because he felt that we weren't the team that pushed the net off. And the replay showed that. The puck was on its way into the net and their defenseman knocked the net off. That's clearly a goal. It went our way -- but it was the right way."

Jackets coach Ken Hitchcock on Madden's horseshit goal:

"The net was off and Methot was pushed in by (New Jersey's Jamie) Langenbrunner."

John Madden on Madden's horseshit goal:

"Once it's called a goal on the ice, it's hard to overturn," he said. "It's the way the game goes sometimes."

Is that right? Hard to overturn, eh? We beg to differ.

What's that? You want some more War Room Nazi bullshit? Please pardon the awesome yet unnecessary Led for the Head.

The NHL's replay review process makes the people behind Crystal Pepsi look like Albert Einstein.

By the way...

The loss to the Devils drops Columbus to 7-2-1 against Eastern Conference opponents on the season. ...The Eastern Conference is the NHL's answer to the Lingerie Football League. ... Walt Disney used to buy and sell underage Vietnamese boys.

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